Digital safety
Blackmail, and a phone someone might pick up
What to do if you're being blackmailed with photos or videos, step by step. And how to set up your phone, browser and Telegram if someone at home or in your hostel checks your device.
There is no such thing as being fully invisible on a device that gets checked regularly. If the checks are systematic, read from a device nobody else has access to.
Step 1. You're being blackmailed — what to do right now
The pattern is always the same: you meet on an app, explicit photos come quickly, then a demand for money and a threat to send them to your family, sometimes "back to Kazakhstan" or "back to Uzbekistan". This is a crime, and you are not the one who committed it. Your immigration status doesn't stop you going to the police.
Don't pay
Not the first time, not the "last" time: people who pay get milked for more. Don't negotiate.
Don't delete the messages
This is evidence. Take screenshots: the blackmailer's profile (name, username, link), every message with threats, the payment details they asked you to send money to, the date and time.
Block and report in the app
Only after the screenshots: block the account and press "Report" in the app.
Call Galop
0800 999 5428, Mon–Tue 9:15–20:00, Wed–Fri 9:15–16:30. A helpline for LGBTQ+ people: they'll explain what to do next and help you report to the police.
Photos already shared?
Revenge Porn Helpline: 0345 6000 459, Mon–Fri 10:00–16:00, free and confidential. They help get material taken down from websites and social media.
Report it to the police
Not an emergency — 101. Danger right now — 999 (if you can't speak, press 55 silently). Need complete anonymity — Crimestoppers: the police don't promise anonymity.
What to say to the police (101) or Galop
“Hello. I want to report blackmail. Someone I met on a dating app is threatening to send my private photos to my family unless I pay them. I have screenshots of the messages and their profile. I have not paid.”
This means: you want to report blackmail; someone you met on a dating app is threatening to send your private photos to your family unless you pay; you have screenshots of the messages and their profile; you haven't paid.
If the photos have already spread
“My intimate images have been shared online without my consent. I need help getting them removed.”
This means: your intimate images have been shared online without your consent and you need help getting them removed.
If you need an interpreter, say: “I need a Russian interpreter, please.”
Step 2. Dating: four rules against blackmail
Before you meet
- First meeting in a busy public place. Tell a friend where you're going and who with.
- Never send anyone from an app a photo of your passport, BRP, ARC or share code, whatever the excuse.
What not to send
- Photos that make you easy to identify: your face together with a tattoo, your work uniform, the window of your room.
- If someone rushes you into another messenger and asks for intimate photos straight away, that's a blackmail script, not interest in you. Stop the conversation.
Step 3. Set up your phone if someone might check it
Quick exit from the site
On any page, press Esc twice in a row and a weather forecast opens instead of Qadam. The back button won't bring you back here: the page is replaced, not opened on top.
This doesn't erase your browser history — that's how all browsers work. What to do about it is on the right.
Browser: private mode
- Open the site in a private tab from the start: Chrome — ⋮ → "New Incognito tab"; Safari — "Private". Then nothing appears in your history.
- Already visited in a normal tab? Delete just that: history → search for "qadam" → delete that entry.
- Don't wipe your whole history. A suddenly empty history looks suspicious in itself.
Wi-Fi: what private mode doesn't hide
Incognito hides your tracks from whoever picks up your phone. But the Wi-Fi owner — at home, in the hostel, at work — and the provider can see the name of the site you connected to (not the content). If that's a risk, turn off Wi-Fi and use mobile data.
Telegram without a trace
- Subscribed to the channel? Archive it straight away: swipe the chat left → "Archive".
- Turn off the channel's notifications so its name doesn't pop up on your lock screen.
- Think about which account to subscribe from: anyone who has you in their contacts can see your Telegram number. If you need anonymity, use a separate account with no number in your contacts and no photo.
The questions people ask most often
I'm without status or waiting for my asylum decision. Will the police tell the Home Office?
The blackmailer is from my country and is threatening to tell my family back home. Does that change anything?
I'm being threatened or insulted because of my orientation, but not blackmailed. Where do I go?
Official sources
Galop
Helpline for LGBT+ people: blackmail, threats, domestic abuse
Open →Revenge Porn Helpline
Help if intimate photos have been shared or someone is threatening to share them
Open →Report a hate crime
GOV.UK: how to report a hate crime
Open →True Vision
Online police form for reporting hate crime
Open →Crimestoppers
The only truly anonymous route — a charity, not the police
Open →NCSC: Cyber Aware
Official guidance on passwords and protecting your accounts
Open →Discrimination: your rights
Equality Act 2010: what counts as discrimination and what to do about it
Open →Sexual Health London
Free tests by post, if you need a check after what happened
Open →Qadam London
How we can help
- We'll go through a blackmail situation step by step: which screenshots to take, who to call, what to say.
- We'll show you how to set up your phone and Telegram if someone at home checks your device.
- If the photos have already been sent out, we'll give you the contact for the right service and explain what to tell them.
- We will never ask why you sent those photos. It doesn't matter.
Phone numbers
Danger right now
999Police, ambulance, fire. If you can't speak, press 55 silently.
24 hours
Blackmail, threats, violence
0800 999 5428Galop. A helpline for LGBT+ people.
Mon–Tue 9:15–20:00, Wed–Fri 9:15–16:30
Struggling and no one to talk to
116 123Samaritans. You can call in any state.
24 hours, free
LGBTQ+ support line
0800 0119 100Switchboard. Talk about anything: coming out, loneliness, fear.
Daily 10:00–22:00
A medical question, not urgent
111NHS 111. They'll tell you where to go.
24 hours
Can't get a doctor
0808 1647 686Doctors of the World. They help migrants register with a GP.
Helpline for migrants
We don't give immigration advice: only an IAA-registered adviser or an SRA or BSB lawyer can advise on your specific case. This page is only about safety and where to get help.
Personal plan · free · 24 hours
Being blackmailed? Get an action plan
Where to report it, how to keep evidence, who can help in your town — step by step, confidential.